How to Find Purpose in Retirement

Retirement! The finish line? Yesterday, I received news of another friend retiring after more than 40 years in a successful career. I sent him a quick welcome to the wild world of retirement and exhorted him to enjoy a time of exploration and freedom.

But having studied retirement in detail for the past three years as an active participant and tireless questioner of those that have gone before me, I thought I’d give a more nuanced response to the keys to a successful retirement. And to test your own retirement readiness, excluding money considerations, I’ve included an important exercise for you at the end.

Here are the top three traits I’ve found present in those who are happy with the new life, sans the 9 to 5 routine: Structure, Meaning and Community. I’ll deal with financial questions in a later blog, but today we’re looking at these keys to a successful and fulfilling retirement.

1. Structure in Retirement. 

I love Sunday nights now. Knowing that tomorrow does not start a new week of mandatory meetings, a commute, deadlines and office routines is liberating. However, that doesn’t mean that I’d be fulfilled with nothing to do.

While researching this topic for six months in a Sun City active retirement community this past winter, I talked to a lot of retirees and found a remarkable consensus that organized structure is still important to lead a fulfilling life.

The Sun City experience was an excellent laboratory for my studies because it brought together a wide age range of residents who had moved to Arizona from a variety of locations and who had a broad diversity of careers. I found over 140 clubs that were designed to let those adept in a certain area share their skills. Those who wanted to learn a new skill were given easy access to classes. All clubs were run exclusively by the residents. It demonstrated a vibrancy you might not expect from retirees.

It was exhilarating to see so much exploration as well as sharing of knowledge among the retirees. My big regret is not taking up my neighbor on his offer to take me to the beginning ukulele class! This particular club had just taught a 92-year-old man to play for the first time reflecting the overall attitude that it’s never too late to learn and explore new interests.

But retirement communities are not for everyone and certainly not essential to develop new structure in life.  Online communities, for example, have exploded in recent years that offer us the opportunity to have a college experience in learning, but without the annoying tests. Or, exercise is a central part of the majority of retirees I have met in or out of retirement communities. Many will tell you they are in the best shape of their lives because the exercise routines provide structure to their schedule each week. Everyone I interview about retirement who are satisfied are actively involved in clubs and activities that give structure to their life. But most exciting to me are those activities that aren’t just time fillers, but that also provide purpose and community.

2. Meaning in Retirement. 

 There are many definitions about what “purpose” means. I prefer to think of it as, “What am I doing that serves others in some way?”

That’s why, for me, structuring time to write this blog is so meaningful. I have always been drawn to the idea of how can I contribute to human flourishing. Time scheduled to write contributes to my daily structure of doing something I love, provides a sense of purpose to my day that I’m doing something important and also leads to community with those who interact on my blog. It’s a perfect trifecta for me!

Interviewing other retirees about this topic usually leads to predictable, but very significant answers. I like to ask, “Where do you find meaning in retirement?”  Among the most cited answers are family, nonprofit engagement, teaching, or involvement as a patron through generous support to causes of special interest. Mentorship of younger generations is a growing trend among retirees as documented in a good book last year by Marc Freedman called, “How to Live Forever.”

The list is endless of course, but I found this quote from John Gardner worthy of contemplation in pursuing meaning in our retirement years:

“Meaning is not something you stumble across, like the answer to a riddle or the prize in a treasure hunt. Meaning is something you build into your life. You build it out of your own past, out of your affections and loyalties, out of the experience of humankind as it is passed on to you, out of your own talent and understanding, out of the things you believe in, out of the things and people you love, out of the values for which you are willing to sacrifice something.”

3. Community. 

I live in the West and I love the independent cowboy spirit that is so much a part of western folklore. But I was also a community banker for 40 years and have grown to appreciate the beauty of community through service on many organizations that make communities thrive.

As I look back on my service on civic, charitable and other boards, I’m not sure I appreciated the personal benefit I received from that community service. When we are busy in our career, raising kids and trying to get established in life, it’s easy to overlook the richness that comes from a life of service in the community.

As a retiree, the need for a sense of community is more important as we walk away from our work community and related organizations we might have served on. As I have observed in talking to others, as well as in my own life, there is a new sense of joy that now comes from my family, my church or even good friends who I can share time with over coffee or a beer. This community does not spring from a sense of duty to serve because it will benefit my business or career. It is authentic and meaningful because if it’s not, retirees are not going to be a part of it. As I have found out in my research, retirees are no longer interested in chasing recognition as we might have at a different season of life. We want community aligned with meaningful purpose.

As I tell my newly retired friends, this is a great time of life to experience community at a level you can never enjoy when you are managing your career, thinking strategically about extending your network through service projects, or distracted by the other things that you have to accomplish today.  

The transition can be difficult for many whose only community has been their career. I’ve talked to some who sheepishly tell me they failed retirement a few times before redefining their community outside of their professional network. That’s not surprising because retirement studies have shown that solid social support is the dominant factor in determining whether retirees are happy and satisfied four years after leaving the workforce. Finding community is job one for those leaving the workforce with a shallow pool of friends and activities outside of their career.

While it’s time to hit the send button on this post, let me leave you with the promised exercise to help you evaluate your readiness to retire, or give you ideas of where you might make changes if you’re already in this season. It’s very simple.

Take a piece of paper and make three columns and write at the top of each one these words: Structure, Meaning and Community.  Now spend some time writing down below the appropriate heading all the things that bring structure to your life, purpose to your daily living and connecting with others in meaningful community. There will probably be many items that go in more than one column.  Then spend some time in self-reflection thinking about what’s missing or out of balance that needs some attention.

I found it to be a useful exercise and I hope it will give you some sense of where you are in finding a quality of life you want.

Let me know what you think!